when am i going to learn?

In the first week of my two weeks holiday,I have successfully-

1.fucked up my own biological clock.it's over 7:30am and am still awake.
2.watched all dvds available at home.
3.disappointed mom for not going to gym nor being on diet.
4.finished a book and now starting my second on john grisham's the client.
5.overslept for 12 hours a day.
6.had pizza two nights in a row.
7.talked to a gd old friend from overseas via the net.
8.dumped a really hot "friend" whom we have been lusting for each other in the last 10 months(very Gd!).
9.trashed self confidence level to a record low.
10.relaxed self from office nightmares.
11.practically lived like a scum bag.

I have not-

1.read 5 books as planned.
2.received any Christmas present.
3.begun writing two features stories for work and sending photographs to editor.
4.exercised.
5.watched my diet.
6.gotten laid.
7.cleaned up bedroom.
8.left home for three days.
9.found love.
10.drunk enough water.
11.gone to Beijing for a snowy Christmas and visited grandma as planned due to laziness.(beginning self-hatred now)

in the coming one week, i shall-

FINISH the damn features and send off photographs or i will be in deep shit!(starting to panic)